With the recent announcement of Prince William getting engaged you can’t help but think of proper etiquette and boys acting like gentlemen.
I used to be one of those dominate women who refused to let a man do anything for them. I would pay for meals and hold doors open and it is no wonder why I would date the more feminine man and would complain that they wouldn’t do anything. I was raised to believe that men and women are equal, and just because I was a woman, it shouldn’t stop me from doing anything. At some point I took that to the extreme and then would make it my goal to beat men at anything. Whether it was making a better meal, to playing video games to lifting a multitude of heavy boxes (and putting my body at risk) I would try to win. And for the most part, I would…
It wasn’t until I dated Tim that I realize that it is ok to be a strong female but I could still be feminine. He (along with therapy) taught me that I didn’t always have to be the hero; that it was ok to ask for help. It was ok for me to not have to try so hard, that I could just stop and be me. A woman. While he is still a good friend, oh how I miss dating him. He was polite and considerate. My favorite act of gentlemanship when we went out? He always opened my car door. No matter where we were, he would always open up my side first and let me in before getting in on his side. When he first started doing it, I thought it was foolish and unnecessary but then I realize that this was what a true gentleman was, a man who thought about woman first (also not caring what I thought). He chose his battles with me, like letting me order my meal after he did or not pulling out my chair unless it was an occasion really called for it. He wasn’t intimidated by my ability to fix things or being hit on in his company. He did a great fantastic job of showing me a different side of men, that it was ok to be a strong independent woman who knows when to ask for help and allowing a man to solve the problem.
There definitely has been some gender swapping over the years like women being the money maker and men staying at home with the kids. Women can be independent, beautiful and soft at the same time and same goes for men being stable, rugged yet also very loving. I think that chivalry is still here, men just don’t want to have their head bitten off when they try and do something nice. So ladies, keep this in mind; if you want a gentleman in your life then follow the golden rule “treat others as one would like others to treat oneself”. Start acting like a lady and being gracious for things and don’t balk when a man tries to do something kind without expecting anything in return and men, don’t be afraid to step it up a bit. This doesn’t mean bowing down to a woman but instead being courteous and polite. I promise the effort will be worth it in the end…